Two Guys Sports
Bruce BostwickWWE Smackdown Wrap Up July 18, 2008 Results
July 23rd 2008 05:05
Smackdown – Charlotte, North Carolina
The show started off with a video montage hyping up Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s wedding. We then go immediately to the wedding where Chavo is being asked for the rings. He pretended he didn’t have them for a moment, but then handed them over. I was very surprised that they got it over with so quickly. Unfortunately we still had to sit through their wedding reception. After they brought everyone out Chavo wanted to say something. He read off a cheesy speech which led into talking about Edge’s match against Triple H at the pay-per-view. Next Edge talked very briefly. The wedding party would stay seated at the top of the ramp in full wedding attire as the show got underway.
Out came Finlay & Hornswaggle, once they got into the ring Edge spoke again. This time to point out how he is going to be the special guest referee for the match. Now in full tuxedos we find out that their opponents are Hawkins and Ryder. Edge took the shillelagh and threw it up towards the ramp.
Finlay & Hornswaggle vs. Curt Hawkins & Zach Ryder
Finlay hit the Celtic Cross, but then Edge speared him leading to a three count for Hawkins & Ryder.
Winners: Curt Hawkins & Zach Ryder
Now it was time for Edge and Vickie’s first dance together. It was clear this was going to be a waste of nearly two hours. I say nearly two hours cause the show is sure to have its moments here and there. Out came The Big Show to cut in by pushing Edge aside and then dancing with Vickie. Edge stops the music and tells Show to head to the ring for his match against his opponents.
The Big Show vs. Shelton Benjamin, MVP, Vladimir Koslov, & The Great Khali
Well, it is clear that they finally think Koslov is good enough to be in the ring with the top talent. After Show shoved Benjamin off with ease MVP was laughing at him, so Banjamin tagged in MVP to see what he could do. MVP approached Show, but then turned and tagged in Koslov. Koslov tried a judo throw/arm drag but of course Show blocked it, and then shoved him to the corner. Khali tagged himself in and after a bit of trash talking and some shoves back and forth Show knocked him to the mat. At this point everyone came in the ring one by one, Show fought them off a bit, but then couldn’t win the numbers game. The ref called for the bell shortly after.
Winner via disqualification: The Big Show
The beating continued with all four kicking and pounding on Show. They then picked him up to his feet so Khali could Khali Bomb him. Problem was Khali could only lift him about 6 or 8 inches off the mat, and that was with Show’s help.
After the break…
Vickie was in the ring with her bouquet, and was ready to throw it to someone, if only she could hear herself over the crowd noise. A few of the Divas were lined up to catch it. Michelle McCool and Natalya started fighting, and Vickie had Hawkins and Ryder come down to remove Michelle. She threw it, Cherry caught it, and then Vickie said that catching it entitles her to a special match tonight, against Vickie. Well, on the brightside at least they got rid of the wheelchair. After a pause Vickie points out before she can face her that she would have to face Natalya. This match lasted 5 seconds with Cherry tapping out to the Sharpshooter. Then Vickie got her turn and pinned Cherry awkwardly.
Back from the break…
Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Brian Kendrick accompanied by Ezekial
As Yang came out Mick Foley said, “Jimmy Wang Yang looks well rested, doesn’t he, J.R.?” Well sure he does, the suspension for violating the WWE Wellness Policy will allow you to rest quite a bit. They have obviously decided to try and make Kendrick a more flamboyant and cocky personality, which by the way will never work. He was accompanied by Ezekial who distracted Yang as he went to the top rope, this allowed Kendrick to grab him from behind and slam him to the mat for the pin. Kendrick tried to flaunt more of his new attitude after the match, but it just looked ridiculous. He has no charisma or showmanship at all, and overacts everything he does. They need to find a quick way to make Ezekial into his own personality so that Kendrick can fade into the locker room again. Ezekial has some potential, underneath the white button-down shirt that was open he looked to be about the size of a Bobby Lashley. I doubt he will catch on as well as Lashley did, but he has a chance to make a name for himself.
Winner: Brian Kendrick
To the back where Edge bumps into Terry the Slim Jim guy who gives him his wedding present, a box of Slim Jims.
Back from the break…
Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga
Kennedy’s transition to fan favorite is pretty much complete now. He is now encouraging the fans to yell his name along with him. In perfect fan fav form, Umaga had a one-handed sleeper hold/nerve hold on Kennedy. The ref raised his arm twice and it fell to the mat, one more time and the match would be over. Charles Robinson raised his arm up, and it fell almost to the mat, but Kennedy raised his arm up ,and got out of the hold. Back from the break… Umaga was still controlling the match. After blocking a Mic Check, Umaga hit the Samoan Spike and got the pin.
Winner: Umaga
Now Mick Foley and Jim Ross point out why the guy gave Edge a box of Slim Jims for a wedding present. It seems that Edge has been named the new spokesman for Slim Jims. They then showed a new commercial starring Edge. It was actually rather disturbing. Snap into your spicy side, oh yeah. He certainly is no Randy Macho Man Savage!
After the break…
WWE Tag Team Champions John Morrison & The Miz vs. Jesse & Festus
This wasn’t a very good commercial for the PPV, which is exactly what it was meant to be. In the end Festus was fighting with Morrison on the floor, while Miz hit the Reality Check and got the pin.
Winners: John Morrison & The Miz
Since they are still in North Carolina you have to give the fans what they want, so out came Matt and Jeff Hardy. Only this time they will be facing one another instead of teaming together. They actually came walking out together. They paused at the top of the ramp near the wedding party. They grabbed the cake and threw it into Chavo’s face, and then headed to the ring.
After the break…
This match was decent, although it did look much more like an exhibition. After a bit the wedding party charged the ring and attacked both brothers. While they held up each brother Edge hit them with a spear.
Winner: No Contest
Back from the break…
The wedding reception has now moved into the ring. Edge starts off talking, and talking endlessly. He then shows a video package for Vickie remembering some moments in their relationship. Luckily as my stomach turned the festivities were interrupted. Out came Triple H carrying a present for thehappy couple. He stopped at the top of the ramp, and started talking. He starts off by saying how he is not out there to tell them he is secretly married to Vickie Guerrero, as he did when Stephanie McMahon was about to be married to Test. Instead he is there to celebrate true love. He has brought some gifts of his own to show just how he feels. He has made a video of his own, that just expresses the love that Edge feels for Vickie. To the tape… Edge hears a knock on the door, pops some breath mints, and then lets the person in. It is Alicia Fox aka the wedding planner, the night before the wedding, Edge wants to talk about the schedule for the next day. At this point Triple H pauses the video to apologize that the beginning of the tape is so boring and just about the wedding planning. Back to the tape for “the good stuff”, this is when Edge starts to make his awkward moves on Fox. At first the planner is reluctant, but then he tricks her into massaging his trapezoid muscle. At this point Vickie is becoming more and more upset. Triple H pauses again and make some comments about how men always invite women up to their rooms when their wives aren’t around so they can get massages. Edge says he is tired of this and sends the gang up the ramp to get Triple H. Triple H said he expected something like this might happen, which brings him to his second gift, he pulls out a sledgehammer. This causes la familia to stay down at ringside. Back to the tape, where Edge is now massaging Alicia’s back. The tape then showed them talking about how he had gone to get Vickie some lingerie at Victoria Secret, but they didn’t have her size, so he was sent to Lane Bryant. He said that when he got there and saw her size it was huge. They both had a laugh over this. Vickie was fuming. Triple H paused the tape again to point out that he was embarrassed for not watching the tape before now, and how that segment just totally ruins gift #3, a large pair of women’s underwear. He says how Edge already has that covered, “but what the hell, I could always park my car under it.” Now back to the tape for the final chapter in the love saga. Edge and Fox begin making out. Vickie begins screaming and hitting Edge. Edge leaves the ring and heads up the ramp as Vickie continues screaming wildly as the show goes off the air.
Ever wonder if the Smackdown writers sit around and ask, "What can we do to make the show worse?" Well the answer to that question is put Edge and Vickie in the show in such a way that they are out at ringside or on the ramp for the entire show! This was a ridiculous episode. We have now seen the rather idiotic storyline that caused Kristal to quit the WWE. She was to play the role of Alicia Fox in this whole thing, but felt the whole storyline was immoral. Somewhere Eddie Guerrero is smiling down on Kristal right now. We can only hope the storyline fully goes away now.
As for the parts of the show that weren't wedding reception related, which were few and far between, there wasn't much to get excited about. It might be nice to actually see a match between Matt and Jeff Hardy at some point.
The show started off with a video montage hyping up Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s wedding. We then go immediately to the wedding where Chavo is being asked for the rings. He pretended he didn’t have them for a moment, but then handed them over. I was very surprised that they got it over with so quickly. Unfortunately we still had to sit through their wedding reception. After they brought everyone out Chavo wanted to say something. He read off a cheesy speech which led into talking about Edge’s match against Triple H at the pay-per-view. Next Edge talked very briefly. The wedding party would stay seated at the top of the ramp in full wedding attire as the show got underway.
Out came Finlay & Hornswaggle, once they got into the ring Edge spoke again. This time to point out how he is going to be the special guest referee for the match. Now in full tuxedos we find out that their opponents are Hawkins and Ryder. Edge took the shillelagh and threw it up towards the ramp.
Finlay & Hornswaggle vs. Curt Hawkins & Zach Ryder
Finlay hit the Celtic Cross, but then Edge speared him leading to a three count for Hawkins & Ryder.
Winners: Curt Hawkins & Zach Ryder
Now it was time for Edge and Vickie’s first dance together. It was clear this was going to be a waste of nearly two hours. I say nearly two hours cause the show is sure to have its moments here and there. Out came The Big Show to cut in by pushing Edge aside and then dancing with Vickie. Edge stops the music and tells Show to head to the ring for his match against his opponents.
The Big Show vs. Shelton Benjamin, MVP, Vladimir Koslov, & The Great Khali
Well, it is clear that they finally think Koslov is good enough to be in the ring with the top talent. After Show shoved Benjamin off with ease MVP was laughing at him, so Banjamin tagged in MVP to see what he could do. MVP approached Show, but then turned and tagged in Koslov. Koslov tried a judo throw/arm drag but of course Show blocked it, and then shoved him to the corner. Khali tagged himself in and after a bit of trash talking and some shoves back and forth Show knocked him to the mat. At this point everyone came in the ring one by one, Show fought them off a bit, but then couldn’t win the numbers game. The ref called for the bell shortly after.
Winner via disqualification: The Big Show
The beating continued with all four kicking and pounding on Show. They then picked him up to his feet so Khali could Khali Bomb him. Problem was Khali could only lift him about 6 or 8 inches off the mat, and that was with Show’s help.
After the break…
Vickie was in the ring with her bouquet, and was ready to throw it to someone, if only she could hear herself over the crowd noise. A few of the Divas were lined up to catch it. Michelle McCool and Natalya started fighting, and Vickie had Hawkins and Ryder come down to remove Michelle. She threw it, Cherry caught it, and then Vickie said that catching it entitles her to a special match tonight, against Vickie. Well, on the brightside at least they got rid of the wheelchair. After a pause Vickie points out before she can face her that she would have to face Natalya. This match lasted 5 seconds with Cherry tapping out to the Sharpshooter. Then Vickie got her turn and pinned Cherry awkwardly.
Back from the break…
Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Brian Kendrick accompanied by Ezekial
As Yang came out Mick Foley said, “Jimmy Wang Yang looks well rested, doesn’t he, J.R.?” Well sure he does, the suspension for violating the WWE Wellness Policy will allow you to rest quite a bit. They have obviously decided to try and make Kendrick a more flamboyant and cocky personality, which by the way will never work. He was accompanied by Ezekial who distracted Yang as he went to the top rope, this allowed Kendrick to grab him from behind and slam him to the mat for the pin. Kendrick tried to flaunt more of his new attitude after the match, but it just looked ridiculous. He has no charisma or showmanship at all, and overacts everything he does. They need to find a quick way to make Ezekial into his own personality so that Kendrick can fade into the locker room again. Ezekial has some potential, underneath the white button-down shirt that was open he looked to be about the size of a Bobby Lashley. I doubt he will catch on as well as Lashley did, but he has a chance to make a name for himself.
Winner: Brian Kendrick
To the back where Edge bumps into Terry the Slim Jim guy who gives him his wedding present, a box of Slim Jims.
Back from the break…
Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga
Kennedy’s transition to fan favorite is pretty much complete now. He is now encouraging the fans to yell his name along with him. In perfect fan fav form, Umaga had a one-handed sleeper hold/nerve hold on Kennedy. The ref raised his arm twice and it fell to the mat, one more time and the match would be over. Charles Robinson raised his arm up, and it fell almost to the mat, but Kennedy raised his arm up ,and got out of the hold. Back from the break… Umaga was still controlling the match. After blocking a Mic Check, Umaga hit the Samoan Spike and got the pin.
Winner: Umaga
Now Mick Foley and Jim Ross point out why the guy gave Edge a box of Slim Jims for a wedding present. It seems that Edge has been named the new spokesman for Slim Jims. They then showed a new commercial starring Edge. It was actually rather disturbing. Snap into your spicy side, oh yeah. He certainly is no Randy Macho Man Savage!
After the break…
WWE Tag Team Champions John Morrison & The Miz vs. Jesse & Festus
This wasn’t a very good commercial for the PPV, which is exactly what it was meant to be. In the end Festus was fighting with Morrison on the floor, while Miz hit the Reality Check and got the pin.
Winners: John Morrison & The Miz
Since they are still in North Carolina you have to give the fans what they want, so out came Matt and Jeff Hardy. Only this time they will be facing one another instead of teaming together. They actually came walking out together. They paused at the top of the ramp near the wedding party. They grabbed the cake and threw it into Chavo’s face, and then headed to the ring.
After the break…
This match was decent, although it did look much more like an exhibition. After a bit the wedding party charged the ring and attacked both brothers. While they held up each brother Edge hit them with a spear.
Winner: No Contest
Back from the break…
The wedding reception has now moved into the ring. Edge starts off talking, and talking endlessly. He then shows a video package for Vickie remembering some moments in their relationship. Luckily as my stomach turned the festivities were interrupted. Out came Triple H carrying a present for thehappy couple. He stopped at the top of the ramp, and started talking. He starts off by saying how he is not out there to tell them he is secretly married to Vickie Guerrero, as he did when Stephanie McMahon was about to be married to Test. Instead he is there to celebrate true love. He has brought some gifts of his own to show just how he feels. He has made a video of his own, that just expresses the love that Edge feels for Vickie. To the tape… Edge hears a knock on the door, pops some breath mints, and then lets the person in. It is Alicia Fox aka the wedding planner, the night before the wedding, Edge wants to talk about the schedule for the next day. At this point Triple H pauses the video to apologize that the beginning of the tape is so boring and just about the wedding planning. Back to the tape for “the good stuff”, this is when Edge starts to make his awkward moves on Fox. At first the planner is reluctant, but then he tricks her into massaging his trapezoid muscle. At this point Vickie is becoming more and more upset. Triple H pauses again and make some comments about how men always invite women up to their rooms when their wives aren’t around so they can get massages. Edge says he is tired of this and sends the gang up the ramp to get Triple H. Triple H said he expected something like this might happen, which brings him to his second gift, he pulls out a sledgehammer. This causes la familia to stay down at ringside. Back to the tape, where Edge is now massaging Alicia’s back. The tape then showed them talking about how he had gone to get Vickie some lingerie at Victoria Secret, but they didn’t have her size, so he was sent to Lane Bryant. He said that when he got there and saw her size it was huge. They both had a laugh over this. Vickie was fuming. Triple H paused the tape again to point out that he was embarrassed for not watching the tape before now, and how that segment just totally ruins gift #3, a large pair of women’s underwear. He says how Edge already has that covered, “but what the hell, I could always park my car under it.” Now back to the tape for the final chapter in the love saga. Edge and Fox begin making out. Vickie begins screaming and hitting Edge. Edge leaves the ring and heads up the ramp as Vickie continues screaming wildly as the show goes off the air.
Kristal Marshall left the WWE after refusing to do this storyline.
As for the parts of the show that weren't wedding reception related, which were few and far between, there wasn't much to get excited about. It might be nice to actually see a match between Matt and Jeff Hardy at some point.
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